The Long-Overdue ADHD-Diagnosed Spinster
Hello, I’m The LOADS. I have ADHD, a diagnosis I received at the tender age of 55. I’d been (half-) joking for years that my job (which required managing deals with deadlines of “ASAP” on the regular) had caused my condition, but eventually (like, DECADES later), and thanks to the diagnosis and ensuing therapy, I clued in that, in fact, I was attracted to and quite good at the job BECAUSE of my neurodiverse brain. Every workday was full of novelty and problems to solve, i.e., an adrenaline- and dopamine-filled dream!
Until it wasn’t.
I finally ran out of gas after years of operating on fumes and chasing that dopamine fix at the expense of my health and relationships. If I was in The Zone at my job, I couldn’t shut myself off. And I was almost always in The Zone. And because of the frenetic, obsessive way my brain approaches every problem, it takes significant mental energy and masking to conform that approach into corporate norms. And it is EXHAUSTING.
So after the first six months of 2024 kicking my personal life’s butt, only to be followed by perhaps the busiest six month stretch of my professional life, I decided that I was done with that part of my life, and was ready for Phase III. So now I’m a retiree!
And because finally navigating the “life” side of my ludicrous definition of a “work/life balance” won’t be chaotic ENOUGH for my executive function-deprived self, I’m also teeing up a move to France. With six animals. And with no current ability to speak French beyond “Bonjour; une carafe vin rouge, s’il vous plaît”.
It’s sure to be a misadventure for the ages! But by hook or by crook, I’m determined to make it happen—and have created this blog to keep myself accountable; to share the good, the bad, and the probably humiliatingly ugly of this attempt to plan something far in advance for a change; and to (hopefully!) provide an ultimately useful roadmap for my fellow soulmates, i.e., anyone overflowing with time blindness, chronic disorganization, irreverence, and short-term memory lapses (for starters), but has big dreams to live abroad.
But if you’re here merely to witness a potential train wreck just for the lolz, that’s fine too—all are welcome!
